Today I will teach you to how bake pancakes, you will learn why your underwear are made out of crushed cereal and why forks have those red glowing thingies on the top of their hats. But most importnant of all you will learn how to wake up next to pshycotic elephant without diving into the snow and not get eaten by a giant rat eating seagull whose mother was ran over by a tomato.
That just goes to show that glasses should not be worn unless you have already set your pants on fire and sung ‘ave maria’ to the giant neighbor who eats dogs in the milkman's dreams and causes millions of lamps to take revenge and kill everybody who trespasses the almighty zone of the penguins of glory.

And that's how we bake pancakes.