Vill ég vekja athygli á því að ég skrifa helst ekki á íslensku því ég vill frekar skapa til stærri hóps, en íslenskumælenda. Þetta er aðeins fyrrsti hluti.

“You think she's prettier than me don't you?” Mary asked for the umpteenth time.
“Yes!” Robert shouted out in frustration “what the fuck do you want me to say!? There will always be someone that looks better than you or me, I've come to terms with it ages ago! Why can't you?”
She feigned an attempt at fighting back tears. “Maybe you'll see one of those pretty girls and just decide to leave me.”
“You know what, I really should.” Robert said and pushed her away, walking away into the darkness. The clouds were appropriate, heavy and midnight blue looming around the full moon, the only sound Robert detected was the sound of snow crunching under his foot.
The Halloween theme started ringing from Robert's pocket. “I wasn't joking Mary, bye.” He turned off his phone and kept marching on towards his apartment. The warmth of the stairwell felt refreshing on Robert's cold face and fingers. Not watching his feet, he tripped over a small package, pulling his coathanger with him to the floor with loud clattering and curses. Robert flailed his arms at the coathanger, pushing it away from him and kicking at it in frustration. Then it broke. He stopped himself before he started roaring. Sitting down in the kitchen, letting himself cool down, Robert decided to check what the package cointained. Eying the coathanger suspiciously he picked up the package and laid it carefully on the kitchen table. For some reason Robert felt like he was stuck in a horror movie, just about to unleash an unspeakable evil. “Heh, only in the movies.” He said to no one in particular and opened it up.
A leatherbound book. “PROJECT EXPLODICON” embedded deep into it, and painted silver. Robert flicked the first page open, “whY?” he resisted the urge to state the obvious. Somehow unable to resist his own curiosity he went to the next page. It was beautifully illustrated, showing a cosmos in impossible muted colours. “I would like to warn you here and now that if you choose to pursue further into this book, you will not be able to depart untill it's over. Paging one page is passing the point of no return. You have been warned.”
Staring at the book in dumbfounded disbelief and disgust, Robert paged forward.
The page displayed a beautifully starry night, with two figures in the snow illuminated by a pillar of fire. A short hairless man wearing a dark coat against som kind of an earthern monster, towering over the man. Robert took a whiff of the air, the stale scent of mold and old socks was gone, replaced by frying grease and coffee. He looked up and saw that he was inside a diner. Jumping to his feet in surprise, he bumped into a waitress and threw her onto a table. “Oh Jesus, sorry!”
The waitress kicked out at Robert, who just barely managed to sidestep her shapely foot. “Asshole!” The waitress shouted, Robert gave her his best apoligetic look, and hurried out of the diner with the book clutched tight to his chest. He stepped out, hearing the familar crunch under his weight. It served as his only hook of comfort. The buildings around him were not familiar, yet the waitresse’s accent had not been foreign. Robert trudged through the cold winter night, greeting passers by wherever he went, they either ignored him or replied politely, much like in the city he knew. He passed a newspaper vending machine and almost cheered at the sight. Crouching in front of it to read the title, he found out he had no idea where he was. Agropolis was not a city he know off, he knew the greek term, but not of the city. Reading on off the front cover, he was little wiser about where he was except that apparently the streets weren’t save and some mammoth went around killing people out late and some crazy vigilante in priestly garbs. Looking at the book, Robert was suddenly filled with rage and tossed it at a wall. It stayed close and unharmed as it bounced off the wall and into the snow.
Robert picked the book up again and resigned to this feeling of helplessness, he tried to call Mary from a payphone, but all he got were weird noises so in the end he wound up in some bar, run by funny talking guys wearing red suits who refused to sell any beer other than Carlsberg. “Ey, partner, you look kinda lost.” Stated a friendly looking, ginger haired, chap in his late fourties.
“Yeah, I kinda woke up in a Diner a few blocks away from here with no recollection about how. I don’t even know where the hell I am.”
“What have you been doing?” Ginger asked quite obviously rhetorically “you be in Agropolis, the most hopeless city on the coast.”
“Forgive my ignorance, but I never even heard of this place untill tonight.”
“Hah! Now you’re just manhandling my nuts. There hasn’t been much in the news these days if not Sir Moxious’ planet saving escapede’s, Lord Xento’s crime syndicate then the Blood Messiah and the Monster stalking the streets.”
“It is the twenty fifth of November, right?”
“Twenny sixth now actually.” Ginger stated pointing at a wall clock behind him, “but aye, 2000”
“2000?” Robert asked flustered. Being in a pre-911 world did not comfort him any.
“Boy-o, you should try to get some sleep, sign into a motel, there’s one five blocks to the left.” Ginger patted him on the shoulder and pointed him to the door, Robert rose to his feet, but shook his head.
“Something perverse is going on and I’m going to find out what.” The words were meant for no one, but grasped the attention of everyone present. Robert suddenly felt very self conscious. “Erm, bye.”

Robert ran out of the bar in a random direction untill he ended up in some abandoned alleyway where something resembling a snow covered hobo might be. “C’mon bookie, you’re opening up to me,” Robert hissed as he fumbled with the book applying all his strength to pry the book open.
“You were warned.” It read before slamming shut again on his fingers and falling in the snow.
Robert picked the book up again and yelled as he slammed the book into a wall. Repeatedly. Calming down he was tempted to sit down in the snow but resisted and instead leaned against the wall and hyperventilated. The possible hobo stirred on the edge of Robert’s vision. Leaning against the wall he started talking to himself“OK, get a grip on yourself Robert, you’re A-OK. You’re just suffering from a reverse mental breakdown from dumping Mary. Your mind just can’t handle the lack of stress right now. You’re OK man, you’re OK.”
“You don’t seem OK to me.” The possible hobo was no longer snow covered, he appeared to be a hairless man in his late thirties wearing a priest’s collar and lacking eyes. Instead two cavities glared at Robert, who responded by jumping backwards on his ass.
“Holy shit, shit shit!”
“Relax my child, I only harm those that are a thorn in the Lord’s side.”
Robert’s eyes wandered and saw twin pistols within the Priest’s jacket. “Should I call an ambulance for you?” he mumbled half coherently.
“It’s nothing, an old wound. By the grace of the Father and the Son it is no handicap to me.”
Staring uncomfortably into the sockets, “right…” was all Robert could muster to continue the conversation.
“Go with God Robert, and check with the local sanitarium. They might be able to assist you.” The priest touched Robert’s shoulder and then formed across across his torso before walking into the darkness. Robert looked after him and the moment the priest was out of sight Robert skedaddled. Growing tired he managed to squeeze himself into the stairwell of some apartment building where he slept as comfortably as he could given the circumstances. He dreamt loud noises, guns being pulled out and hanging in the air while flying over a city. Robert woke up quite terrified drenched in cold sweat, sniffing himself, he discovered he reaked. As luck would have it, a person on the street pointed him in the direction of a nearby swimming pool. He quickly showered and got back into his stinking clothes, feeling a little bit better. As he was about to leave the swimming pool he noticed a newspaper lying on a table. Robert sat down at the table and checked the headline “Moxious to Investigate Monster!” Reading through the article Robert only learnt one thing he found important. Sir Moxious was some kind of magician that recided in a large tower in that very same city. It was worth a shot.