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So it’s Date One with your latest dream girl, and you’re on your best behavior. After all, you’re hoping she’ll be seeing God—or at least the ceiling over your headboard—before long. But even though you were on time, complimented her dress, and picked up the tab, you ended the night alone. Now you’re wondering why. Though women are loving and forgiving creatures, we know damned well that you put on your best face until you bed us. That’s why we rely on a secret index to assess you. Chances are your date saw through your facade and took a good hard look at the real you. Oops.

What exactly are we looking for? Clues that reassure us that you’re a nice guy, that your last address didn’t include the words maximum security facility, and that you’ve got skills in bed. Here’s a sneak peek at the actual checklist.

Does he pay close attention to the finer details?
Before you flip out, hear us out. We certainly don’t expect you to sport the latest from the fashion pages or to get manicures. Let’s be real—that’s our job. However, showing up with a bleach stain on your pants (no matter how small) or in a stale shirt that slept in the hamper last night will register as disaster. (When in doubt, always assume we’ll notice.) Why? Because if you can’t take care of yourself, deep down we know someday we’ll be forced to take care of you. “I was wowed by my date, not because he was so drop-dead gorgeous or impeccably dressed, but because his shoes were so damn shiny,” says Cara, 25. “A guy who remembers to shine his shoes? Now that’s impressive.”

How do you let us know you’re not a thumbsucking basket case? Clean up dirty fingernails, put on actual cologne, and spring for the $50 haircut—again, we’ll notice. The quick fix is to take personal hygiene to 11. And instead of spending those last five minutes before your date watching Market Wrap Up, try ironing the creases out of your shirt. The payoff will be huge.

Is he nice to strangers?
Displaying complete mastery of gentlemanly courting rituals—picking us up without honking, holding doors open, not wiping your nose on your sleeve—means squat. That stuff’s expected these days—there’s no bonus for being nice to us, since we know we’re the ones you’re hoping to play plump the pillows with. To determine if you’re well-adjusted and not just faking it for the sake of sex, we’ll watch how you do unto others: What’s your tone with the clumsy waitress? Are you bossy when asking for the check? Do you tip the bartender well? Do you give directions to dumbfounded tourists? All these are good indicators of how you’ll end up treating us—both in and out of bed—when the relationship has solidified.

“I knew my boyfriend was ‘the one’ from our first date,” says Rosa, 25. “He was the first guy I’d dated who was polite to everyone we encountered. It was great and, best of all, came naturally to him.” So do yourselves a favor, fellas—help the lady in the wheelchair up the ramp, and wait until your gal’s in the bathroom to kick the bum on the curb.

Is he independent?
Contrary to our reputation for being clingy, needy creatures, we women actually want you to have a life of your own. No, seriously. We don’t want to date someone who calls 20 times a day with nothing new to say, either. Fact is, knowing that you’ve got things going on makes you more appealing to us. “This guy was telling me about traveling in Australia,” says Patti, 28. “He made it sound so great that by the end of his story I wanted to jump on a plane with him and head down under.”

More importantly, a life of your own means we won’t have to play mommy. When a guy’s confident and capable, we can sit back and be princesses. Not the adventurous type? Just let us know that your social life isn’t always about loafing around and eating Froot Loops from the box. Be sure to tell us what you like to do for fun—even if it does happen to be collecting comic books—and you might find us a little more animated about you.

Does he have a clean track record with women?
Guys, here’s the thing: We know you’ve dated before. In fact, if you haven’t, that’s cause for alarm. When the past comes up, don’t be afraid to give us a glimpse into it. Just don’t give us an intimidating rundown of all your conquests. And although you might think “My ex is such a psycho!” is a reassuring compliment to your current, nonwacko date, it’s actually the kiss of death. “It tells me he thinks the woman is always to blame,” says Sarah, 23. Remember, we’ll already be wondering how you’ll describe us to all of your friends if we break up.

So couch things in moderate terms. You don’t have to lie (we know you’re not a virgin, sweetheart), but be discreet. “All I want to hear is that he has a few relationships under his belt and that he’s still looking for a woman he can really fall for, like me, for example,” says Caroline, 27. Feel free to fudge the date time line a bit if need be. Gals get a little freaked if a guy has dated someone for more than a decade (“He can’t commit!”) or if his longest relationship endured a mere two weeks (“I’m the next casualty!”).

Does he rebound after life’s little setbacks?
Granted, “chipper” isn’t sexy, but neither is a permascowl. Women are searching for a good-tempered man who smiles and laughs in all the right places. That little grin or wisecrack tells us you’re playful, easygoing, and, most of all, secure. But we’re well aware this can be faked; the real test is how well you recover from a mini-disaster. Says Sarah: “If you can’t deal with a mixed-up dinner order or having your newspaper delivered late, what are you gonna do if the shit really hits the fan? Fall apart and cry?”

We understand people have bad days, and it’s OK to complain a little—gals gripe, too, obviously—but for best results, make an effort to ditch the melancholy act even if it seems justified. (You wouldn’t want to hear us nitpick all night, would you?) “The best date I ever went on was with this guy who didn’t do the whole self-deprecation thing,” says Jane, 25. “All girls really want is a guy who is secure and, most of all, together, the kind of guy who will make us better just for knowing them.” Now, who wouldn’t want to be around that all the time?

We know what you’re thinking—we think way too much. These notions of ours may seem trite to you, but we promise that your efforts will be rewarded. Ace our checklist, and your target gal will let you in on some even sexier secrets.



Vona að þetta nýtist ykkur =) Mannom