“I'm going fishing.” Really means: “I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety.” “It's a guy thing.” Really means: “There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical.” “Can I help with dinner?” Really means: “Why isn't it already on the table?” “Uh huh,” “Sure, honey,” or “Yes, dear.” Really means: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned...

1. You know…I've been complaining a lot lately. I don't blame you for ignoring me. 2. That was fun! When will all of your friends be over to watch porno's again? 3. The new girl in my office is a stripper…I invited her over for dinner on Friday. 4. While you were in the bathroom, they went for it on fourth down and missed. If they can hold them to a field goal, they'll still cover. 5. Bar food again?? Kick ass!! 6. I liked that wedding even more than ours. Your ex-girlfriend has class. 7....

Harrie Potter was a highly unusual boy in many ways. For one thing, he hated summer holidays more than any time of year because it kept him out of school. Harrie loved school and he loved to do homework. You see, Harrie was a wizard. The reason Harrie never enjoyed his summer holidays was because he lived with the Dunderhead family on Privet Drive. Uncle Venereal, Aunt Polyp, and their son, Crudley, were Harrie’s only living relatives. They were Muggins, and they had a very medieval attitude...

mig dreimdi einu sinni að ég var í gömlum skála með vinum mínum um nóttina vaknaði ég af einhverjum ástæðum og allir vinir mínir voru horfnir. ég var að fara að labba niður þegar einhver réðst á mig með risastórum beittum skærum og stakk þeim í gegnum ristina á mér og alveg í gegnum löppina við það vaknaði ég með hræðilean sársauka í löppinni og fanst eins og hún væri blaut en auðvitað var ekkert þar. hvað þíðir það eiginlega og er virkilega hægt að meiða sig í svefni?

Every time I close my eyes I'm thinking about you still And every time I close my eyes I'm dreaming of you untill I close my eyes and dream forever 'Cous in real life it won't happen no never Yes every time I close my eyes Every time I dream of you Tears are raining from my eyes And every night I'm feeling blue When I'm not whith you And I don't know what to do.

Don't say forever 'Cous foorever will never last Don't say forever 'Cous forever is in the past Don't say forever But most of all don't say never Just say you love me every day that you do Then I will spend the rest of my life saying that to you

Death is just the begining of a new life and place. only then can you start all over again and be what you want to be and do what you want to do without everybody telling you what is right or not. Don't end up like all the others who were to scared to do what they wanted. You only live once