Two old ladies were outside their nursing home having a smoke when it started to rain. One of the ladies pulled out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette, and continued smoking. Lady 1: “What's that?” Lady 2: “A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet.” Lady 1: “Where did you get it?” Lady 2: “You can get them at any drugstore.” The next day, Lady 1 hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a package of condoms. The guy looks...