A young guy met a very attractive older woman on a night out. She was in her mid 50's, but had a fantastic figure. He was escorting her home when she said to him, “Have you ever had a sportsmans double? Mother & daughter together at the same time?”
“No,” said the young guy, “I haven't.”
“Well tonight may well be your lucky night,” she said.
They entered her house & the young guy was shaking with anticipation. The woman switched on the hall light & shouted up the stairs, “Mum, are you awake?”

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When NASA was preparing for the Apollo project, it did some astronaut training near a Navajo Indian reservation.

One day, a Navajo elder and his son came across the space crew. The old man, who spoke only Navajo, asked a question which his son translated.

'What are these guys in the big suits doing?'

A member of the crew said they were practicing for their trip to the moon.

The old man got very excited and asked if he could send a message to the moon with the astronauts.

Recognizing a promotional opportunity, the NASA folks found a tape recorder.

After the old man recorded his message, they asked his son to translate it. He refused.

They then took the tape to the reservation, where the rest of the tribe listened and laughed but refused to translate the elder’s message to the moon.

Finally, the NASA crew called in an official government translator. He reported that the message said, ‘Watch out for these guys. They have come to steal your land.’