Q. What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree ?

A. Hold on to your nuts, this is going to be a hell of a blowjob !

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Q. Whats the difference between a nigger and a tyre ?

A. Tyres don't sing when you put chains on them …


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Q. How do you get a kleenex to dance ?

A. Blow a boogie into it.

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Q. Why did the poof get fired from the job at the spermbank ?

A. He was caught drinking on the job …

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Q. Whats the definition of a perfect woman ?

A. a) Three feet tall with a round hole for a mouth and a flat head

so that you can put a pint of beer on it.

b) The sports model has pullback ears and her teeth fold in.

c) The economy model fucks all night and at midnight turn into a

roastbeef sandwich and a sixpack.

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Q. How do you get four poofs on a barstool ?

A. Turn it upside-down …


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Q. Why do blacks wear widebrimmed hats ?

A. To prevent birds from shitting on their lips.

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Q. Why do blacks wear platform shoes ?

A. To stop their knuckles from dragging on the ground.

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Q. What do elephants use for tampoons ?

A. Sheep.

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Q. How do you say “fuck off” in jewish ?

A. “Trust me!”

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Q. Whats the definition of jewish foreplay ?

A. Two hours of begging.


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Q. What's the brown stuff between the elephants toes ?

A. Slow natives.

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Q. What's better than roses on your piano ?

A. Two lips on your organ …


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Q. What does it say inside a nigger's lips ?

A. Inflate to twenty pounds.

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Q. Why brixton niggers have such small steeringwheels ?

A. So that they can drive with their handcuffs on …

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Q. Whats the difference between a Jew and a pizza ?

A. Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

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Q. Why do Jews have such big noses ?

A. Air is free …

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Q. What did Adam say to Eve ?

A. You'd better stand back, I don't know how big this thing gets.

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Q. What's yellow ugly and sleeps alone ?

A. Yoko Ono.


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Q. What do you get if you cross a nigger with a monkey ?

A. Nothing, monkeys are too intelligent to fuck niggers.

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Q. Why does Barbara Bush always get on top ?

A. Because George can only fuck up.


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Q. What do you do if you see a drowning nigger ?

A. Throw him an anchor.

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Q. How do you save a drowning nigger ?

A. Take your foot of his head.

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Q. What do you call an Irishman with half a brain ?

A. Gifted.

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Q. Why do women have two holes so close together ?

A. In case you miss.

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Q. What do you call a beautiful girl in England ?

A. A tourist.

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Q. What is the title of the new Vietnamamese cookbook ?

A. 100 way to wok your dog.

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Q. Why don't niggers drive convertibles ?

A. Thier lips would slap them to death in the wind.

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Q. Whats the ultimate rejection ?

A. Your hand falling asleep while your having a wank.


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Q. What happens when a jew walks in to a wall with a full erection ?

A. He breaks his nose.

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Q. How many blacks does it take to pave a driveway ?

A. It depends on how thin you slice them.

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Q. What's the difference between a bowlingball and a westindian girl ?

A. You can only get three fingers in a bowlingball.

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Q. Do you know how to save a drowning nigger ?

A. No ?!?

Good!

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Q. Why is Italy shaped like a boot ?

A. Because you couldn't get that much shit into a shoe.

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Q. How did god make puertoricans ?
A. He sandblasted niggers.

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Q. What are the three greates lies ?

A. 1) Black is beautiful

2) The check is in the mail

3) Of course I won't come in your mouth.

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Q. Why do women have two holes so close together ?

A. So you can carry them home like a sixpack.

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Q. Why wasn't jesus born in the U.S.A ?

A. Because god couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.

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Q. Why do Italians wear hats ?

A. To know which end to wipe.

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Q. How did the Irish acid-bath murderer loose his hand ?

A. Pulling out the plug.

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Q. What is the only bad thing about the ‘69’ position ?

A. The view.

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Q. Whats the definition of a vicious circle ?

A. A cunt with teeth.