A young man walks up and sits down at the bar. “What can I get you?” the bartender inquires. “I want 6 shots of Jagermeister,” responded the young man. “6 shots! Are you celebrating something?” “Yeah, my first blowjob.” “Well, in that case, let me give you a 7th on the house.” “No offense, sir. But if 6 shots won't get rid of the taste, Nothing will.”


A small guy goes into an elevator, when he gets in he notices a huge dude standing next to him. The big dude looks down upon the small guy and says: “7 foot tall, 350 pounds, 20 inch dick, 3 pound left ball,3 pound right ball, Turner Brown” The small guy faints! The big dude picks up the small guy, brings him to, slapping his face and shaking him, and asks the small guy.
“What's wrong?” The small white guy says, “Excuse me but what did you say?” The big dude looks down and says “7 foot tall, 350 pounds, 20 inch dick, 3 pound left ball, 3 pound right ball, my name is Turner Brown.” The small guy says, “Thank god, I thought you said ‘Turn around.’”


A student of proctology was in the morgue one day after classes getting a little practice in before the final exams. He went over to a table where a body was lying face down. He removed the sheet over the body and to his surprise he found a cork in the corpse's rectum. Figuring that this was unusual, he pulled the cork out, and to his suprise, music began emanating “On the road again…Just can't wait to get on the road again…”. The student was amazed, and placed the cork back in the rectum. The
music stopped. Totally freaked out, the student called the Medical Examiner over to the corpse. “ Look at this. This is really something!” the student examiner as he pulled the cork back out again… Just can't wait to get on the road again… “So what?” the Medical Examiner replied, obviously unimpressed with the student discovery. “But isn't that the most amazing thing you've ever seen?” asked the student. “Are you kidding?” replied the Examiner, “Any asshole can sing country music.”

There is this Castle, and in it is a magic mirror. If you tell the truth in this mirror, it will grant you a wish. If you lie to it, it will send you to Hell. So, this old haggard lady limps up to the mirror and says, “I think that I am the most beautiful girl in the world. POOF! gone straight to Hell. Next, this extremely fat woman waddles up to the mirror and says, ”I think that I am the most beautiful woman in the world.“ POOF! gone straight to Hell. Finally, this Drop-dead gorgeous blonde walks up to mirror. She
looks into it and says, ”I think…" POOF!