Things You'll Never Hear A Man Say:


Here honey, you use the remote.


You know, I'd like to see her again, but her breasts are just too big.


Ooh, Antonio Banderas AND Brad Pitt? That's one movie I gotta see!


While I'm up, can I get you anything?


Honey since we don't have anything else planned, will you go to the wallpaper store with me?


Why don't you go to the mall with me and help me pick out a pair of shoes?


Aww, forget Monday night football, Let's watch Melrose Place.


Hey let me hold your purse while you try that on.


We never talk anymore

Things You'll Never Hear A Woman Say


What do you mean today's our anniversary?


Can we not talk to each other tonight? I'd rather just watch TV.


Ohh, this diamond ring is way too big!!


And for our honeymoon we're going fishing in Alaska!


Aww, don't stop for directions, I'm sure you'll be able to figure out how to get there.


Is that phone for me? Tell ‘em I’m not here.


I don't care if it is on sale, 300 dollars is too much for a designer dress.