No! Not That!

Morris asks his son, now aged 10, if he knows about the birds and
the bees. “I don't want to know!” the child said, bursting into
tears. Confused, the father asked his son what was wrong.

“Oh dad,” he sobbed, “at age six I got the ‘there’s no Santa'
speech. At age seven I got the ‘there’s no Easter bunny' speech.
Then at age 8 you hit me with the ‘there’s no tooth fairy'
speech!?”

“If you're going to tell me now that grown-ups don't really have
sex, I've got nothing left to live for!”
“The best accelerator available for a Mac is one that causes it to go at 9.81 m/s^2.”