Sleep Now
Jake was watching vigilantly at his dying wife's side. ‘'Sleep now, its all right,’' he told her.
But she kept trying to sit up and said, ‘'Honey, I really need to tell you something.’'

Finally Jake let her get it off her chest.

''Jake, honey, I need to tell you something before I die. During the last two months, I slept with your brother, your best friend and your father.''

''Shhhhhh. Relax darling. Don't worry about it,'' Jake said, ‘'I already know. Why do you think I poisoned you?’'



What's for Dinner?
A concerned husband goes to see the family doctor and says, “I think my wife is deaf because she never hears me the first time I say something, in fact, I often have to repeat things over and over again.”
“Well,” the doctor replies, “go home and tonight and stand about 15 feet from her and say something. If she doesn't reply, move about five feet closer and say it again. Keep doing this so we can get an idea about the severity of her deafness.”

Sure enough, the husband goes home and does exactly as instructed. He starts off about 15 feet from his wife in the kitchen and as she is chopping some vegetables, he says, “Honey, what's for dinner?”

He gets no response. He moves about five feet closer and asks again. No reply. He moves five feet closer. Still no reply. He gets fed up and moves right behind her, about an inch away, and asks again, “Honey, what's for dinner?”

She replies, “For the fourth time, vegetable stew!”

mér finnst fyrri betri