> A young man is wandering, lost in a forest when he comes upon a small house.
> Knocking on the door he is greeted by an ancient Chinese man with a long gray
> beard.
> “I'm lost,” said the man. “Can you put me up for the night?”
> “Certainly,” the Chinese man said, “but on one condition.” “If you so much as
> lay a finger on my daughter I will inflict upon you the three worst Chinese
> tortures known to man'”.
> “OK” said the man, and entered the house.
> Over dinner, the daughter came down the stairs. She was young, beautiful and
> had a fantastic body. She was obviously attracted to the young man as she
> couldn't keep her eyes off him during the meal. Remembering the old man's  
> warning he ignored her and  went up to bed alone.
> During the night he could bear it no longer and snuck into her room for a night of  
> passion. He was careful to keep everything quiet so the old man wouldn't hear and,
> near dawn, he crept back to his room, exhausted but happy. He woke to feel
> a pressure on his chest. Opening his eyes he saw a large rock on his chest
> with a note on it that read: “Chinese Torture 1:  Large rock on chest.”
> “Well, that's pretty crappy”, he thought. “If that's the best the old man can do
> then I don't have much to worry about.”
> He picked the boulder up, walked over to the window and threw the boulder out.
> As he did so, he noticed another note on it that read:
> “Chinese Torture 2:  Rock tied to left testicle.”
> In a panic he glanced down and saw the rope that was already getting close to taut.
>  Figuring that a few broken bones was better than castration he, jumped out of
> the window after the boulder.  As he plummeted towards the ground he saw a
> large sign on the ground that read,
>  “Chinese Torture 3:  Right testicle tied to bed post.”