xxxxx´s theory on BMW owners.
(A lot of BMW owners tried to stop the making of this
file…..they are not that smart)
There are two kinds of BMW´s owner in the world.
NR. 1
The rich BMW owner who buys a new, big, expensive BMW
straight from the dealership. This is all right
because they usually sell the BMW in less then one
year. This shows some evidence of an average IQ and
money.
NR. 2
These are the guys who buy the cars from the from the
rich, averaged IQ owner. We like to call them
wannabes, and for those of you who haven´t figured it
out….the X-files are about them.
MORE INFORMATIONS ABOUT THE WANNABE.
(how to spot them and how to keep away)
First of all there is a song by Offspring about these
kinds of BMW owners (Pretty fly for a white guy) but
you uncool people might not know that song.
So first we have to spot those wannabes, that is kind
of easy. They usually wear something that has the BMW
labeled on it. This does not need to be a big thing,
it might simply be a key ring or a ring on their
fingers. If you meet some one who is actually wearing
a BMW jacket or a BMW sweater, be sure that he is
lower then the wannabe, he is a wannabe wannabe who
does not own a BMW but is dreaming about it. But for
now, let´s stick to the wannabes. Even though the
wannabes are labeled with such small things they are
very dangerous. The average IQ of a wannabe BMW owner
is less then 80 and if that is not danger to the
society I don´t know what is. In spite of this low IQ
they somhow manage to make enough money to buy an old
BMW. I have studied this for a while and the conlusion
is that they get the money from living with their
parents until they are 35 years old.
The wannabe can also be known by an unusual glow on
his face. This is the same kind of glow normal people
get from having sex. But you must not let that fool
you, the wannabe did not just have sex, they usually
go on very long with out having sex, or until they
find a girl, desperate enough and from such a low
class that she will settle for any one she thinks can
support her and her 6 children. So back to the glow
on their faces. The glow comes from the fact that the
wannbe thinks he´s important, truely they think they
are…..because they drive a BMW. And driving a BMW
is a GREAT thing. This is why they spend endless
hours looking at their cars, thinking how wonderful
they are. Even though they spend these hours just
looking at the BMW they find time to drive around down
town, doing 2 miles per hour so everyone can see them
and their BMW, blasting up the stereos with songs that
are sooo yesterday. They are totally clueless of how
uncool they look, but that is ok because it helps us
to spot them out of the crowd so we can avoid them.
Thank you, if you need to know more about the wannbe
BMW owners just get the Offspring cd, Americana and
listen to the song Pretty fly for a white guy or
cantact me at howtospotawannabe@home.gov
The BMW wannbe wannabe
(Ohh yes they do excist so be aware….be very aware)
The wannabe wannbe BMW owner is the scariest one of
them all. They are dangerous. Their IQ is usually
around 60 and they are usually spotted looking at
very old rusty BMWs and thinkin how they would like to
have THAT car some day. You can also spot them very
easily becuase all their clothes have the BMW sign on
them. Their lifes envolves around trying to be a cool
BMW owner (which we all know do not excist). When the
wannabe wannabe BWM owner is not looking at some
really really old BMW he´s pretending to be a wannabe
BMW owner, talking on their toy mobile phones about
the stock markets and stuff like that.
These wannabe wannabes live in their parents trailers,
there they life until the parents throw them out or
simply the parents die. Their bedrooms are usually
coverd with pictures of the wannabe wannabe posing
infront of a BMW they don´t own. They work part time
at McDonalds or Subway and you can tell they are
wannabe wannabe BMW owners by the facht that they have
no stars on their name tags.
The girls that go for these guys are the wannabe
wannabes neighbors…..and have the same idea as the
wannabe wannabe BMW owners. They keep hoping that one
day this dream about the BMW will come true so they
can finally drive out of the trailor park with some
dignity. I´m so sorry honeys……..trash will be
trash and a BMW will always be a BMW.