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Why were sidewalks invented?
So Yugo owners would have a safe place to walk home.

How do you make a Yugo go fast?
Push it out of an airplane.

How do you double the value of a Yugo?
Fill the gas tank.

What do you call the passengers in a Yugo?
Shock absorbers.

What do you call a Yugo at the top of a hill?
A miracle.

Why do Yugos have heated rear windows?
To keep your hands warm while you are pushing them in the winter.

Why are all Yugo owners going to heaven?
Because they have already been to hell.

What do you call a Yugo with twin tailpipes?
A wheelbarrow.

What is the difference between a golf ball and a Yugo?
You can drive a golf ball 200 yards.

What is the difference between a Yugo and a shopping cart?
A shopping cart is a lot easier to push.

Man goes into a parts store and says “I'd like a rear view mirror for my Yugo”.
Man behind the counter thinks about it and says “Sounds like a fair trade to me”.

What is found on the last two pages of every Yugo owner's manual?
The bus schedule.

What do you call a Yugo with brakes?
Customized.

How do you make a Yugo go faster downhill?
Turn off the engine.

How do you improve the appearance of a Yugo?
Park it between two 914s.

Why do Yugo owners never carry a map?
It'll never get far enough to get lost.

What is the smallest part of a Yugo?
The owner's brain.

What do Yugos have in common with Ferarris?
- A Ferarri can go from 0 to 60 in 4 seconds.
- A Yugo can go from 0 to 4 in 60 seconds.

What's the most wasteful way to spend money?
Buy a car alarm for a Yugo.

Optimist - A Yugo owner with a radar detecto