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Ad Campaign Leaves Pie on Microsoft's Face

People accuse Microsoft of devious tactics all the time. Microsoft generally
denies the accusations - after all, they're flanked by the best lawyers that
money can buy.

This week, though, Microsoft gave itself a big, goopy pie in the face. On
Oct. 9, the company posted a testimonial on its Web site called "Confessions
of a Mac to PC Convert." It was a first-person account by a "freelance
writer" about how she had fallen in love with Windows XP. She compared the
operating system to a Lexus. "I was up and running in less than one day, Girl
Scout's honor," burbled the attractive, 20-something brunette in the photo.

There was only one problem: She doesn't exist.

A with-it member of Slashdot.org, the popular hangout for articulate nerds,
happened to notice that the woman's picture actually came from
GettyImages.com, a stock-photo agency. Associated Press reporter Ted Bridis
took it from there. He tracked authorship of the article to one Valerie
Mallinson, a public-relations woman hired by Microsoft to write the story.
Microsoft was caught red-handed.

I was dying to find out how this public-relations fiasco came to pass, but
Microsoft spokesman Tom Pilla would speak only in Officialese. "The article
was mistakenly posted to the Microsoft Web Site," is all he would tell me.
"Once we realized that it wasn't part of the Windows XP marketing activities,
we pulled it. It's an unfortunate situation, and we take responsibility."

No wonder Microsoft has become a laughingstock online. "Once we realized . .
. ?" Hello? Exactly how disconnected are the right and left hands of
Microsoft's marketing organization?

And then there's the feebleness of the ad itself. Not only is it a childish
attempt to mimic Apple's "Switch" campaign, but Microsoft's bogus customer is
hopelessly misinformed. "AppleWorks pales in comparison to Microsoft Office
XP. There's no equivalent for the versatility of Microsoft Word, Excel and
PowerPoint," she writes, evidently never having heard of Microsoft Word,
Excel and PowerPoint for Macintosh.

Then she makes it worse: "Internet Explorer 6 does more for me than Netscape
Navigator ever did. . . . I can name and organize my Favorites any way I
want." First of all, Internet Explorer is on the Mac, too. Second, had Ms.
Fictitious ever, in fact, used Netscape Navigator, she might have realized
that it, too, permits naming and organizing bookmarks.

To be sure, the online community is wasting no time in rubbing these gaffes
in Microsoft's face. But nobody's mentioning the most disturbing part of all
this: That it's part of a longer string of fraudulent Microsoft marketing
efforts.

In 1998, the Los Angeles Times reported that Microsoft, during its antitrust
trials, hired PR companies to flood newspapers with fake letters of support,
bearing ordinary individuals' names but actually written by Microsoft PR
staff. Payments were funneled through Microsoft's PR company so that the
checks couldn't be traced.

Later, during the antitrust trials, Microsoft attempted to prove the
inseparability of Windows and Internet Explorer by showing the judge a video.
There was only one problem: The government's lawyer noticed that as the tape
rolled on, the number of icons on the desktop kept changing. Microsoft
sheepishly admitted to having spliced together footage from different
computers to make its point.

And now a phony testimonial illustrated by a photo bought from a stock-art
agency.

What does all of this say about a company's corporate psyche that it feels
the need to fabricate evidence of the public's love?

Maybe Microsoft is jealous of the genuine affection Mac fans seem to exhibit
for their machines. Or could it be that the company somehow feels rejected by
the quirky (and as far as anyone can tell, real) people in Apple's "Switch"
ads.

But more likely, Microsoft's latest blunder demonstrates neither jealousy nor
wounded pride - it's pure arrogance. The company thinks it can get away with
anything. This time, at least, it's wrong.

A screen shot of the original Microsoft ad can be viewed at:
<A HREF="http://www.scripting.com/misc/msSwitchAd/lies.jpg">http://www.scripting.com/misc/msSwitchAd/lies.jpg</A>.<br><br>,,Don't Make me come down there'' <i>-God</i